Psa No. 611: Lucid Cheese Tripping

Originally published Wednesday June, 1st 2005


Public Notice: The Axis of Stevil is aware of the new public trend of eating large quantities of premium Jack and Mozzarella cheeses. This is said to induce nightmarish and disturbing imagery in your dreams, a lucid trip if you will. While there is no adverse health risk to this overdose besides your waistline, heart, and ability to operate small-incased vehicles. The mental trauma that ramifies itself after the tripper has awoken is staggering.

Lactosa L. Terriblé, a young man, described his experience to The Axis of Stevil:

"It was a crazy! I was there, but I couldn't move.... Ok and like my hair, it IT was on fire?! I mean WTF!!! [Nervous laughter is heard] But ok so like that pony was there…Pink Pony.... [The subject’s eyes glazed] Sgt. Tropple... [The subject becomes aware] He just kept saying I couldn't park here… and I was shouting at him that I want to move… but I couldn't and my hair just kept burning.... then… then… The Walrus got me....’Game of cricket mate?’ [The subject bursts into tears and is inconsolable]"

The Axis of Stevil wishes the best for all recovering cheese heads, and their families.

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